Bourgeois Deviant

Monday, September 18, 2006

The Paks Are In The Lead

From Friday's (9/15/06) press conference w/ President Bush.

QUESTION: ... Mr. President.Earlier this week, you told a group of journalists that you thought the idea of sending special forces to Pakistan to hunt down bin Laden was a strategy that would not work.

BUSH: Yes.

QUESTION: Now recently, you've also...

BUSH: Because, first of all, Pakistan is a sovereign nation.

QUESTION: Well, recently, you've also described bin Laden as a sort of modern day Hitler or Mussolini. And I'm wondering why, if you can explain, why you think it's a bad idea to send more resources to hunt down bin Laden wherever he is.

BUSH: We are, Richard. Thank you. Thanks for asking the question. They were asking me about -- somebody report -- well, you know, your special forces here. Pakistan -- if he is in Pakistan, which this person thought he might be who was asking me the question -- Pakistan's a sovereign nation. In order for us to send thousands of troops into a sovereign nation, we've got to be invited by the government of Pakistan. Secondly, the best way to find somebody who is hiding is to enhance your intelligence and to spend the resources necessary to do that. And then when you find him, you bring him to justice. And, you know, there is a kind of an urban myth here in Washington about how this administration hasn't stayed focused on Osama bin Laden. Forget it. It's convenient throw-away lines, you know, when people say that. We have been on the hunt, and we'll stay on the hunt until we bring him to justice. And we're doing it in a smart fashion, Richard, we are. And I'll look forward to talking to President Musharraf. Look, he doesn't like Al Qaida. They tried to kill him. And we've had a good record of bringing people to justice inside of Pakistan, because the Paks are in the lead. They know the stakes about dealing with a, you know, a violent form of ideological extremists. So we will continue on the hunt, and we've been effective about bringing to justice most of those who planned and plotted the 9/11 attacks, and we still got a lot of pressure on them. The best way to protect the homeland is to stay on the offense and keep pressure on them.

How is an answer like this acceptable from a sitting President of the United States? The only urban myths in Washington are President Bush's competency, that his administration sees actual reality as the rest of us do and that America is actually on the offensive in the war on terror.

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Thursday, September 14, 2006

Playlet: Midgets, Water & Puerto Ricans

By Mrs. Bourgeois Deviant

Based on actual events.

Scene: The “R” train, Manhattan bound. Mrs. B.D. sits with 7 week old BFD happily sleeping in Baby Bjorn. They are heading to lower Manhattan to meet B.D. for lunch.

Two middle-aged men get on the train after her. One, Italian, well dressed and the other disheveled, wearing a dirty yellow fleece. We will call him DYF (dirty yellow fleece.)

DYF (to no one in particular): So my daughter is dating a midget.

[Two Latin women sitting next to me laugh nervously. Mrs. B.D. looks up to see DYF looking her. Stupidly, Mrs. B.D. takes bait.]

Mrs. B.D.: Technically its “little people.” [makes air quotes]

DYF: My daughter is 5’7”. He’s 5’5”.

Mrs. B.D.: Then he’s just short. You have to be under five feet to be a “little person.” [again making air quotes]

DYF: Whatever. He’s still a midget in my book.

[Mrs. B.D. shrugs and goes back to admiring 7-week-old BFD’s little head.]

DYF: I wonder if Fiji water is really from Fiji.

[Mrs. B.D. looks around the train to see what provoked this comment. Sees poster for Fiji water.]

DYF: I don’t like water. It’s tasteless. I like my water to have some flavor.

[Mrs. B.D. looks at his silent friend sitting next to him. He shrugs in embarrassment.]

Mrs. B.D.: It’s water. It’s not supposed to have a taste.

DYF: [oblivious] Now I like mineral water. Mineral water has some taste to it. I bet the Fiji water isn’t even from Fiji. It says its artesian water. You know artesian wells have to be at least 6,000 feet deep. Distilled water has no taste either. [Looking at Mrs. B.D.] Do you know what distillation is? It’s when they boil it. You know, I grew up drinking New York City water.

Mrs. B.D.: You’re a connoisseur of water?

DYF: Yes I am. Do you know why New York City water tastes so good? Because they pipe it in from upstate New York.

Mrs. B.D.: Mineral water doesn’t have a taste either, it’s just carbonated.

DYF: No. It has flavor. Now Russian water tastes good! You know you can buy Russian water in stores? [several beats] I hate waiting in lines. In the morning when I was at the Deli at breakfast time, I hated waiting in lines. Everyone was in line for coffee and I hated waiting so I would go up to the counter and order potato salad and chocolate milk. I figure I like potato salad and I like chocolate milk. Why not eat them together? Wherever I go I order potato salad. I know potato salad.
[to the two Latin women next to Mrs. B.D.] You know I’m a tourist today. I’m from Florida now.

Latin Woman 1: Did you go there to retire?

DYF: Yeah, sort of. A friend of mine had a condo in Clearwater, fully furnished, and I’m renting it for $650. I gave my daughter my place up here. My daughter and the midget.

Latin Woman 1: That’s nice.

DYF: You know there are a lot of Puerto Ricans in Clearwater. There are a lot of Puerto Ricans in Florida. They use to go all over the United States and New York City but now they only come to Clearwater. The only other place in New York City you can find Puerto Ricans is in the Bronx.

[A few moments go by in wonderful silence.]

DYF: Yeah, water should have a taste.

[BFD whimpers.]

[Train stops]

[Mrs. B.D. and BFD get ready to exit the train at the Whitehall Street. Stepping off the train, DYF to Mrs. B.D…]

DYF: You shouldn’t drink soda. Too much sugar. Flavored water would be better.

[Mrs. B.D. looks down at left hand holding half full Sprite Zero bottle. Contemplates throwing it at DYF's head.]


© MBDeviant 2006

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Tuesday, September 12, 2006

If you haven't seen it or read it, watch it.

This is excellent and right on the mark. I have never paid much, if any attention to the network sanctioned pundits, but Olbermann has earned my admiration and respect with this speech.

Transcript and original post here. []

Update: DCeiver has another great post in a similar but more positive light.

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Friday, September 08, 2006

Koppel on Rose

Worth the time spent.

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Thursday, September 07, 2006


This film being released soon is quite possibly the most frightening thing I will see this month, if not the rest of the year. I haven't seen the film yet, but this trailer is quite upsetting. Probably worth it just to see how this country is in certain regions, in my estimation, rotting.

Under the "Religion" heading in the right hand column, check out the link for Jesus Camp.

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Sunday, September 03, 2006

Guilty Pleasures: Realized Edition

First, let me say that the call is still out there for your delicious guilty pleasures.

That said, as if to help me get back in the swing of things...

Ages ago when Mrs. Deviant and I first found out that we were expecting BFD (then 3B), we knew we would have to get some gear for the kid. Being in NYC, the hub of all things trendy and new, we saw a lot of folks with Bugaboo strollers. The more we observed, the more we gleaned that there was a total attitude that came with those particular strollers. We quickly determined that we weren't having any part of it.

Back in April, I wrote this little bit about an alternative to the Bugaboo that would both satisfy our need to give our child the best and, at the same time, stick it to those Bugaboo parents. For those of you who are too lazy to follow the link, we got ourselves a Micralite stroller w/ newborn carry cot. Since BFD has been with us, it has served extremely well.

Today, the Mrs. and I decided to take the little man out for a stroll through Prospect Park. We hadn't been there in a while and BFD had yet to debut there. So, off we went with the kid in the Micralite. Brooklyn, it has been said of late, is the new Manhattan. Park Slope, for those of you who don't know the neighborhood, is one of the places that allows people to say that with some degree of validity. And, as you might well guess, there are a ton of Bugaboo strollers to be seen.

While walking the slate cobbled sidewalks of the neighborhood, I noticed Bugaboo parents noticing our Micralite. The look on their faces wasn't so much one of curiosity as it was of subtle yet utter disbelief that they had been out-cooled in the stroller department. My shit eating grin was involuntary and irrepressible. My dream had come true, we had stuck it to those stuck up Bugaboo parents. Totally pleasurable and totally materialistically guilty in that pleasure.

As Dyske Suematsu said in that aforementioned post,
I feel I achieved a higher level of superficiality than anyone else has with a stroller... and about the rush I feel when I walk by Bugaboo owners. I act nonchalantly, like I didn't’t even notice them, and say silently in my head, “Suckers!” Now, I wonder what comes next in my parenthood.

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Friday, September 01, 2006

Its his fault...

As all three of you might have noticed, this here rag hasn't had any new content in ages. Its not my fault! Its this guy's:

(Photo courtesy of T. Biglin)

Brodie Finn Deviant, born July 26, 2006. Weighing in @ 7 lbs. 11 oz. and 22 in. long. He's a doll and Mrs. Deviant and I love him to death, natch. He does consume our time like no other, though.

So, the infant formerly known as Bourgeois Baby Bananas (3B) is heretofore called BFD. And, with that change, changes to this blog as well. New look, slightly new format, new right column stuff, tags and any other kind of techno gadgetry I can figure out to incorporate that is either useful or entertaining. At least, I hope so.

Let me know what you think. Its good to be back!

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